Brava!

What’s up buttercups?

I woke up bright early yesterday morning and did YOGA MELTDOWN. I lie, I lie. I DID do Yoga Meltdown but I woke up at 7 and figured I’d jam it in before I had to leave at 7:40. As a result, I wore a headband to work. I looked cute. Good thing too because I had a date with Mel in the evening.



Okay, instead of answering all the questions today let’s go through the things I didn’t do. I think that might go against Kris’ suggestion to “focus on what you DID accomplish”, but what the hell. I have yet to spend 5 minutes in nature, its cold and 5 minutes is a long time. I still haven’t purchased a neti pot or a dry brush so we know I didn’t do either of those. I didn’t stop eating 3 hours before bed because that is 3 hours too early. I also went for a tan which probably cancels out 5 of the questions I answered right. No I didn’t drink alcohol, but I did bake my skin in fake sunlight for 10 minutes. You have to tan before you go to Mexico. You just do. Otherwise the Mexican's will see you as an easy target and attack. "Cheapy Cheapy. Special price for YOU". Before you know it you'll be a pasty pesoless Canadian covered in henna tattoos and silver. Don't say I didn't warn you. Your hair will probably be braided too.

Moving on. I did eat loads of cooked veggies, raw veggies, Whole Food Optimizer, H20, I shook my booty for 35 minutes, I steered clear of coffee, booze, animals and gluten, I laughed, told someone I loved them and I MEDITATED. All of which over power the first paragraph. Right? right.

Speaking of baking in fake sunlight, remember back in January 2010 when I was scared I had skin cancer? And I was never going to tan EVER again? I do. In fact i'll copy and paste exactly what I said...

I had a Physical this morning (told you I’m getting healthy) at 9:20. I booked it because I have a suspicious mole on my right cheek. It’s suspicious because I suspect that it’s trying to kill me via skin cancer. I feel like a victim until I remember the days worth of hours I’ve logged in a tanning bed. Damn my younger self.

When I left the doctor’s office I was really disappointed with my whole experience. I’m not sure if the doctor had laser vision, was psychic and see’s no illness in my future or if she had decided upon seeing me that she didn’t like me, therefore, doesn’t care. She might as well have poked me with a stick, said “your good” and sent me on my way.

If I had a picture of her I’d post it HERE:

But damn it I don’t.

The suspicious mole has 6 months to kill me before she checks it again.

Come to think of it I can't remember if I had her check it 6 months later. That's what killers do, they mind fudge you. I should still work on getting that picture of my doctor too... Anyway, back to the cleanse. On the day 3 page of the cleanse Kris Carr writes..

"Wednesday-hump day. You may hit your first real wall today. Brava! Hit it and then climb it, champ. It's really just a speed bump. You may feel some physical detox symptoms, such as fatigue, headache, a foggy brain, skin rashes, and muscle weakness. That's okay; it's normal."

Is this a cleanse or an STD gone arye? If you're feeling these symptoms I'd say you're about a bum sore away from Gonorrhea. Brava! You should probably go to your doctor. If it's not, then WHAT have you been eating? Hard drugs?

I haven't hit a wall yet. However, I am getting a little tired of my current Brussel Sprout, Cauliflower, Butternut Squash combo. But unfortunately in an attempt to avoid the grocery store I stalked up. Either I have to eat it all myself or I need to throw a dinner party, invite 20 friends, get them drunk and feed them nothing but these 3 vegetables. Who likes Brussel Sprouts??



I had a small mishap with my supper Socca..



Beside me my Man was also eating a Cleanse friendly Suppa..



Dinner Party Dessert?!

My Sludge brings all the boys to the yard…



And they’re like, it’s better than yours. Damn right, it’s better than yours. I could teach you but I'd have to chaaaarge.